It’s so insane that these were the exact words I needed to hear. Today’s devotional hit home.
Many of you hear me complain about my work place. You know, doing work actually doesn’t bother me. ‘Work is work’ they say.
It’s not even that. For me, it’s just 42 hours a week of pure loneliness. I’ve never sat around a desk in a room for so many hours and felt so lonely.
It feels familiar yet foreign. I have fought and fought with myself. I blamed myself for being too shy and introverted in this kind of environment.
I make conversation, to find that the person starts using their phone two sentences in because they’re simply not interested. We crowd around one table to eat lunch, while I aimlessly scroll through my phone because I’ve exhausted all of my surface talk questions, and so have they.
Some days I blame them and their attitudes and wondered how can people be so close-minded. I wondered if there was anyone they did like in the office. Other days, I’d blame myself. Some days I’d comfort myself and think that God put me here so I can learn something – so I can grow and be refined. There is a purpose for every season – some seasons might be tougher than others.
Some days, I’d feel guilty for complaining because at the end of the day, I have a job. I am being paid for doing… not a lot.
These days, I’ve just started counting down the days. My mind has been fighting with the loneliness. It came to the point that being alone was the only option to feel less lonely.
However, today’s devotional. MANNNN.
I can’t even. God is so, so good. I’m just going to paste it here because!!!! I hope that this blesses you today too.
Identity – Devotional 26th April 2018
I think the journey to discovering our true identity is one we walk our whole lives. Our understanding doesn’t always unfold in the time frame we’d like, but God is always at our side, urging us onward, holding us close to him.
I imagine God weeps when we try to be someone we are not and when we tell him who we are is unacceptable. We don’t speak up because it’s not okay to be seen as the one with questions. We try to change our appearance because we’re dissatisfied with how we look.
When I was little I would watch quiet girls and wish to be like them because in trying to be like them I wouldn’t have to be me. Sarah is an American with an important history in Vietnam; she is Vietnamese but can’t speak the language of her biological family. Where does she fit in?
As far as the question relates to her cultural identity, the answer is still working itself out.
But when it comes to her identity in Christ, the answer is clear: she belongs in the arms of the God who created her exactly as she was meant to be and put her in exactly the story he wants her to experience.
If our desire to fit in causes us to turn our backs on the fact that we belong safely in God’s arms, we might never experience a true sense of belonging.God didn’t make me quiet and demure, and he didn’t make me to conform. He made me uniquely me, just as he made Sarah uniquely her. I know and believe it. I don’t try to be someone I am not anymore, and I can tell you for sure that not everyone likes the authentic me. That’s okay. Sarah doesn’t pretend either.
Today what she tells her children and helps other women try to embrace as well is this: “Be who God created you to be. He places value on you being you!
It’s okay to look or act different from other people. Just be yourself and be strong in who you are.
Be strong in God.”I have found truly embracing who we are with all of our strengths and brokenness to be very freeing. When we each finally embrace this truth for ourselves, I believe God has a party and rejoices!